Eagle Scout Part 2: What My Son and I Got from BSA

Today I heard a few personalities on my favorite national radio morning show briefly discuss the Boy Scouts of America Eagle Scout Award.  This conversation stayed on my mind all day and I really felt the need to tell people about what it is, the tremendous amount of work involved in earning the award and what it does for a young man as a person.   Since I tend to write what I know, I am going to use my son's experience as the source of what you are about to read. 

First, a legal disclaimer:  This is only one Scout's results.  Results may or may not be typical.  I really can't tell you that every young man who starts out as a boy on the path to becoming an Eagle Scout will have fantastic results.  I am, however, pretty confident that chances of a boy becoming a better man improve exponentially WITH an experience in scouting as opposed to not having that experience. 

Here is the story of my son:

When my son was 6 and in the first grade, he came to my classroom after school with the standard "Join Cub Scouts, it'll be the best fun you every had" flyer.  Of course, he was all gung-ho to join with all of his little first grade buddies.  So I thought, "Sure, why not?"  I was naïve and thought "Good activity for his dad and him." "Quality time for the boys." And I'm not going to lie, I also thought "I can get some papers graded while they are off doing Cub Scout crap." 

Well, it didn't quite turn out that way.  Although my husband is a pretty good dad, he just wasn't one to go do organized activity stuff.  So I took my son (Cody) to his first meeting.  OH. MY. GOODNESS!!!  So many rambunctious little first grade boys RUNNING around the meeting room!  (GASP!)  Now, at the time, I was a second-grade teacher, and very familiar with the typical behavior of little boys.  However, I was unaccustomed to seeing my son really cut loose with all these other little fellers with wild abandon.  I tried as quickly as I could to get what information I needed and get out of there.  Finally, I couldn't stand it.   I decided if Cody was going to act like he was acting right now, this may have been a horrible idea.  I started to get him and bolt for the door. 

Then, something happened that changed both of our lives and I will never forget it.  The guy in charge very sweetly told me Cody was acting perfectly fine and asked us to please stay.  I often think back to that very second in time and realize how much different raising my son would have been if I had decided to walk out at that moment.   I am so thankful to that man for stopping me. 

So Cody became a Tiger Cub on that fateful September evening in 2000.   There were the usual outings, field trips to local state parks, family camp-outs (for us, that meant Mom & Cody camp outs), a few fundraisers, and finally a week of cub camp in late July.  Cub camp was a day camp, and we fortunately just happen to live very near a beautiful BSA Camp.  Cub camp was held there, and on the fourth day of camp, we were allowed to spend the night. 

A little fun side-story about cub camp:  Cody and I happened to wake up very early in the morning and decided to venture out for a little walk.  All the tents were packed together into a shady grove.  As we were trying to sneak through all those tents, we heard various snores coming from a tent here and a tent there, back and forth.  We were both trying so hard not to laugh at the see-saw sound of the snores produced by our camping friends.  It's just a wonderful memory that I have and was probably the first time I realized that Cody's sense of humor was similar to my own. 

So, we did the Cub Scout thing for the next four and one-half years.  This period of time is when my son established friendships that remain strong and solid to this very day.  The boys with which Cody became close during his Cub Scout experiences remain his closest friends even now that they are out of school and working full-time jobs or in college.  These lifelong friends are the guys you will find sitting on a bench outside a small local donut shop on any given Friday evening.  They aren't out looking for stuff to steal or drugs to do.  They are content to just hang out together and catch up with each other.  These friendships were formed when these boys were 6, 7, and 8 years old.  These boys had parents who were willing to spend time with them in a worthwhile activity.  Most of what they have in common can be traced back to Cub Scouts.  They learned and grew together and forged a mighty strong bond.  So the first thing my son gained from Scouting, was a solid foundation for a network of good, reliable friends.  A kind of support system. 

Well, those boys grew a little older, as boys tend to do.  They became middle-school students, and also shortly thereafter, Boy Scouts.  They started going to summer camp where they stayed an entire week, nights and all. Various parents took turns hanging out in camp to assist their Scoutmaster.  While there, they had the opportunity to earn merit badges at stations, they got to go swimming, fishing, canoeing, and performed skits together for other troops who were also at camp during their designated week.  They gained a little more independence each year during their scouting experiences.  We were incredibly blessed with a Scoutmaster who truly took an interest in helping each boy to learn about all sorts of things from astronomy to woodcraft to just being a good person in general.  He insisted on good behavior and for the most part, those boys were more than happy to deliver what he expected because they knew he cared about them and they respected him for it.  How many guys would use their week of vacation to go and camp several miles from any real civilization with a group of pre-teen boys and no electric, no comforts of home, in early July???  Those boys could never, ever deny that their Scoutmaster cared about them and truly wanted to help them learn.  So the next thing my son gained from Scouting was confidence in himself, an ability to problem-solve on his own and to be self-sufficient.  In addition, he learned from his Scoutmaster's example that giving of one's time and knowledge to help others is one of the best blessings a person can bestow upon another.

Finally, those boys made it to high school and were very busy trying to make sure they were getting requirements completed in order to reach the next rank, with the ultimate goal being Eagle Scout.  Their little troop consisted of maybe 6 or 7 boys at this point.   There were lots more campouts, a few more fundraisers, and planning for next summer's camp.  The Scoutmaster would meet individually with each boy as he prepared to move up in rank.  The group did a 50-mile kayak trip over a period of 5 days.  they participated in several organized hikes being conducted at some of the nearby state parks.  They watched older members become Eagle Scouts and began to think of their own possibilities of attaining the coveted rank.  They each began to think about what they could do for their own community service project and began to do some serious planning while finishing up their merit badge requirements.  It was during this period of time in the Boy Scouts that my son learned to take on more responsibility for himself.  He learned to work as a team with his fellow Scouts to help each of them achieve a common, yet individual goal.   This was the period of time when Cody really seemed to put down deep, deep roots in his community.  Maybe it was from all of the community service projects in which he participated, or maybe from meeting so many community leaders as a result of those projects,  Likely a combination of the two.  This is where networking for him really began, in my opinion.  Networking that would help him in the future as far as figuring out a career path, deciding whether and where to attend college, and this networking that would ultimately help him in finding a good, stable job.  That's a pretty huge benefit that you can't even fathom when your son is 6 years old and wants to join Cub Scouts!  You don't even consider that they are going to meet people and learn to do things that are going to carry them through life and help them to become respectable men.   When they're 6, you're kind of just hoping you can be a good parent and the kid will idolize you for having a good time with him.   At that point, a parent can't even envision  that this tiny person is going to grow up and not need constant supervision.   As a parent of a 21 year-old, I'm here to tell you this:  they ARE going to grow up someday, 

Finally, Cody made it to the Eagle Scout project:    The crowning achievement in a Boy Scout's career.  For Cody's project, he decided to map and catalog a nearby cemetery, organize the information into a spreadsheet with an index and a digital copy for the local genealogical society.  He went through all of the steps that I listed in Part One of my Eagle Scout blog posts.  This project took the better part of a year.  During that year, he learned to contact a stranger in order to begin the process,  he learned to present himself in a professional manner, he learned to "sell" an idea to another person and to put some serious thought into planning a project from start to finish.  He learned to find people to help him and to manage those people.  He learned that sometimes it's tough to get a group of people to be available at the same time.  He learned what it is to commit to something and follow through on it, and he also learned that sometimes its tough to stick with a commitment, but it's always worth it in the end. 

This isn't my most eloquent writing, but it's perhaps my most important because I want other people to know what my family gained from Scouting.  There is so much more than what you see on the surface.  I was far from a perfect parent.  I had no idea what I was doing.  But I am eternally grateful to the guidance that the activities in which my son participated as a Cub Scout and Boy Scout gave to both him and me.  I made very good friends and established a wonderful support system through Scouting, just as much as Cody did. 

As I look at my hard-working Eagle Scout son today, I am both tremendously proud and humbled.  His dad and I cannot take full credit for the responsible adult that he has become.  I owe a huge debt of gratitude that I can never repay to the his Scoutmaster and Mrs. Scoutmaster and his Cubmaster, in addition to the other parents who had boys in Troop 39 with Cody.   The best I can do is to honor them by sharing this story of what the process of becoming a Cub Scout, Boy Scout and finally, Eagle Scout involves and what it really does for boys on their way to adulthood. 

Here is an awesome link with some interesting little factoids about Scouts: Scouting Statistics

Eagle Scout Part 1: Nuts & Bolts

I'm always amazed when the urge to write something that the rest of the world "just has to know about" strikes me.  It just grabs hold and I have got to stop what I am doing and get it off my chest.  Today, such an urge has stricken me and here I am, typing away, about to impart some great tidbit of knowledge.  Is it going to be more than potential readers care to know?  You bet.  That's ok.  Read it or not.  I still have to write it regardless of what the readers decide to do with it.

On my favorite morning radio show today, the topic of Eagle Scouts was discussed.  To make a long story short, it seemed that there was just some general curiosity amongst the panel of radio personalities as to what being an Eagle Scout actually means and how much of a big deal it is to have earned this prestigious award.   

I can tell you from personal experience, it is a VERY big deal.  And, of course, I'm going to tell you why.  After I tell you why, I am going to share with you a little about my own son's experience with the Boy Scouts of America and his journey to becoming an Eagle Scout.

Cub Scouts start out usually around age 6.  Sure, it's pretty much fun and games at this point.  They do field trips, fun activities, maybe a campout with parents here and there.  But guess what?  They are also learning.  They are learning about being part of a group, taking pride in their uniforms, working as a team to accomplish goals.  These rambunctious little boys are building friendships, some of which they will carry with them throughout their lives.  As these boys grow older, they are given more challenging tasks, and they begin to learn about what their next steps will be toward becoming a Boy Scout.  Parental involvement is crucial.  This isn't the kind of organization where you can just dump your kid off so you can go home and have a free hour to mow the yard or whatever.

Finally, when these Cub Scouts complete their requirements to become Boy Scouts they are usually around 11 years old.  They will have a "crossing over" ceremony.  At this point, the Scouts begin earning merit badges.  A common misconception is that merit badges are earned just by doing fun little activities.  Sure, part of the activities should be fun.  However, earning them requires way more work on the part of the scout.  Each badge has items that the scout must be able to perform successfully in relation to the badge, along with demonstrating the knowledge he has acquired during his work toward earning the merit badge.  Each merit badge must be taught by a certified merit badge counselor who will also verify that the scout has met the requirements for that particular merit badge. 

If I were to try to list an example of the requirements for just one merit badge, you probably would not continue reading.  However, here is a link that you may use to take a look at all the different merit badges and what the requirements would be for each one: 
BSA Merit Badges and Their Requirements

It's important to know that many of the merit badges are electives that the scout may choose based upon his own personal interests.  However, in working toward becoming an Eagle Scout, there are some merit badges that a Boy Scout is REQUIRED to complete.  Some of these required merit badges are camping, cooking, family life, personal management, environmental science or sustainability, communications, personal fitness, first aid, and emergency preparedness, just to name a few.  To apply for Eagle Scout status, a scout must have earned 21 merit badges.  He will need to have earned these between the time he became a Boy Scout at around age 11 and before he turns 18.  That probably doesn't sound like much unless you go to that link above and just look at the requirements for just one of those merit badges. I assure you, most merit badges require intensive work and learning. 

Now comes something bigger:  The Boy Scout must plan, organize and execute a community service project.  He must find a non Scouting-affiliated organization within his community that will allow him to provide some sort of service.  The project should be something that will leave a legacy.  In other words, something that is a long-lasting improvement for the organization for whom he has chosen to dedicate his time and effort.   He must meet with a contact person within that organization to "pitch" his project idea.  He must submit a written plan to that contact person and get approval signatures from the organization contact person, the local Eagle Scout Committee Chairperson, and his Scoutmaster a.k.a "Troop Leader."    He must find and organize volunteers to help him complete the project - volunteers are REQUIRED;  the scout cannot simply take on a task and do all the work himself.  He must find donors to provide or sponsor necessary materials.  He must document all expenditures and volunteer hours.  He must manage other people in executing the project.  He is in complete charge of the entire project. He is responsible for seeing it through to the end and ensuring that it is done correctly, in a timely manner.   He must recognize his volunteers, donors, sponsors and any other people who have helped him with letters of thanks. 
Keep in mind, he is younger than 18 years of age as he is working on this project. 

Finally, after he has completed his community service project and a variety of folks in high places have signed off on its successful completion, the prospective Eagle Scout must meet with his troop leader and make sure he has met all requirements in order to proceed with his application to become an Eagle Scout.   Here is a link where you can see the requirements that he must meet before he will be considered for "Scouting's Highest Honor":   http://www.scouting.org/scoutsource/BoyScouts/AdvancementandAwards/eagle.aspx

After all of that work is complete, the prospective Eagle Scout must be interviewed by a committee who will ultimately determine whether he has completed all requirements in a satisfactory fashion in order to receive the prestigious rank.  It is possible even at this stage that he will not be approved and will need to repeat or make corrections to some part of his requirements.  Prior to the interview, the scout has obtained letters of reference from at least 3 people he knows.  These letters of reference are mailed directly to the head of the committee and the scout has no idea what the letters of reference contain.  The committee reviews these letters prior to the interview with the Scout. 
At last, during the interview, he must demonstrate that he has internalized the standards of the Boy Scouts of America.  He must answer questions about his strengths and weaknesses, he will be challenged to share his ideas about how he would improve his own troop, he will share stories of good and bad experiences he has had during his time as a Boy Scout.  This interview is not merely a "formality." 

If the committee is convinced that the young man is worthy of the rank of Eagle Scout, they will sign off on his application which will then be sent to the Boy Scouts of America Local Council for final approval.  The Scout cannot be awarded the rank of Eagle Scout until notification of approval is received back from the BSA Local Council. 

Ok, so this blog post has been a little dry.  I'd be surprised if anyone has actually managed to read my "in a nutshell" version of what goes into being awarded "Scouting's Highest Honor." 
Therefore, I've decided to write a separate blog post in order to share with you my own personal experience during my son's Eagle Scout Journey.  I'm pretty sure that's going to be a bit more interesting and hopefully help the average person get a picture of what it really is all about and to understand why in the world a teenage boy would spend so much time and effort toward becoming an Eagle Scout.  

To be continued . . .
  

Mud Boggin' on Foot

     In my quest to become more active, I've been seeking out a variety of places to walk and hike.  Today's adventure took me to a local state park.  I found one abandoned road that turned out to be fairly short and it had a few obstructions with downed trees.  I went through and around the obstructions, hoping that the path would continue far enough to satisfy my curiosity about where it ended up.  I was disappointed to find, after trekking around the largest obstacle, that it merely dead-ended in a clearing.  Still, I was proud of myself for not letting the obstacles stop me.  I found a way through and around and now I know that particular path is not a good one.  

     So I turned around and went back.  Something I LOATHE having to do.  I want things to have an outcome without repeating what I already did.  But I sucked it up and went  to another path.  The next path went about 20 steps in before heading up an enormous hill. I know my limits pretty well and so I placed this path in the "maybe later" mental file, turned around AGAIN, and sought out my next conquest.  

     By now, I had stumbled upon a posted trail map or two and knew what trail I was gunning for.   However, I have a penchant for finding what I think are unique ways of getting to places. The whole "Road less traveled" thing rules. This is what always gets me into trouble, and I know it.   Yet I insist on doing it anyway, because you never know, it might be more fun. 

     I decided, instead of following the nice, easy, asphalt-paved road with its perfect yellow and white stripes, I would follow the path around the perimeter of the small lake.  And it was good until I got to the part where the path was closely sandwiched between the surrounding hill and mist-blanketed lake.  That's where the mud was hanging out.  Not wanting to go back (remember my loathing of such a course of action?), I decided to get through the first patch as best I could and it would probably not be so bad on down the line.  Big miscalculation.  I kept going, and the mud patches just seemed to get wider and deeper.  However, by now, I had come through so much that I really, really hated to turn around and face the same mud through which I had already slogged my way.  

     All this muddy trekking resulted in one shoe full of mud and the other mostly just muddy on the outside.  I started thinking about shoes, and realized that my opposition to owning more than a few pair may need some adjustment.  I'm not one of those people that needs an entire walk-in closet just for my shoes or a line in my budget labeled "shoes."  I've always figured 3 pair are plenty:  sneakers for cold weather, flip-flops for warm weather and a neutral pair of dress shoes for the occasional funeral. 

    The mud bog hike got me to thinking that perhaps my life is in a different place now and I need to invest in a pair of shoes for the occasions in which I might find myself in messier terrain.  I know I'm not going to stop exploring paths less traveled to simply avoid a little mud.  The cold-weather sneakers simply don't fit the bill for hiking unknown paths. 

     So today's tidbit of truth is this:  Paths in our lives lead us to sometimes feel the need to expand our "shoe collection,"  as each season of our lives brings different responsibilities and different roles.  Often those responsibilities and roles come without much choice in accepting them, so we as well gear up for them and forget about turning back.  

Taking Stock

It's been over 2 years since I've been a classroom teacher.  That causes me to ponder quite a bit how much my life has changed since the incident that kicked it all off.   If you are new to my blog, the explanation of that ugliness can be found in several posts beginning in July 2013.  

For one thing, my dad finally "gets it."  The "it" being why I could never continue a career that was no longer what it was intended to be initially.  I no longer have to feel like I somehow robbed him of a source of pride.  He's probably more proud of me now that he realizes I wouldn't go back even if I weren't afflicted with an illness, simply because I refuse to be part of something that (in my opinion) seeks to destroy childrens' lives. Maybe that's being overly-dramatic, but we'll see in about 15-20 years. 

Another thing, I have not had daily headaches and nausea as I did when I was working.  Whether that was a psychosomatic thing or actual toxicity within my work environment, I'll never be 100% certain.  I don't really care.  Sick is sick, and I'm thankful that stuff has gone.  

Nobody thinks of schools as being "toxic" environments.  That is, unless they've worked in one and had the opportunity to really learn the dynamics of how things get done and how things work and how it all has to proceed.    

I suppose I should be happy as well that  I managed to get out alive and land somewhat on my feet.  But I haven't reached that point yet.  I hope I can someday forgive the way I was treated and not have this simmering anger just below the surface all the time.  Unfortunately, it's still there and just as potent as it was in the days and months immediately following my exit.  It's just going to have to fade because I see no other way.   

One thing I don't have anymore is daily interaction, with kids, adults, really anybody or anything except my pets.  Maybe that makes me a crazy cat lady, but so what?  Animals are easier anyway.   Truth be told, though, I do miss the kids. And some of the adults.  But this is just the way it has to be and I'm pretty content with solitude.  

I've acquired many new skills.  I can perform slightly-more-than-minor car repairs, I can crochet, I'm more exposed to what's on television, I have no idea what is happening in the news, I've learned to play the mountain dulcimer, I have way more legal smarts than I should, I can do a few household appliance repairs and some carpentry, and I've picked up some caregiver skills. I've made a couple new friends along the way as well.  

So, it's not all bad, and the journey continues . . .